March 30, 2008

Knowing self

Having not felt or experienced poverty or hunger in life,its been a smooth sail for me since birth.Of course none wants to be born poor or feel it.I had had no much feeling on how pathetic that particular situation is other than the statistical information that I get from news media or internet until I saw something which still remains fresh and haunting.

I was on my way to New Delhi to attend a quiz competition.It was a marathon train journey and just the thought of spending three days in train was really disheartening.But an opportunity never knocks twice,so I thought this is my chance and had decided to attend the competition along with my classmate and my teacher.We had carried with us ,a lot of food stuffs,especially a lot of snacks.It was really a nice journey and we were in the last day of our journey.It was almost around 11 am in the morning when I remembered that I was carrying 3-4 bananas with me and I had forgotten to take them out.It was stuffed deep in the bag and two days of its stay in the bag had almost melted it.It had become something like a paste.We ate those parts which we found comfortable with and the remaining we threw at the track.I think at that time,the train was halted at Mathura.I could see three-four children with torn off clothes and dusty faces jumping out from the platform to the track.I was wondering what they were looking for.I was to witness the most heartening scene I had ever seen in my life.I could see those children fighting for those pasty and uncomfortable part of the food stuff that we had thrown on the track.Leave the uncomfort and things,the whole hygiene factor was thrown out in air coz they only needed something to answer their bellies.They cleared the food stuff and had a satisfied and elated faces.

I was just thinking about the limits or parameters that different people set in their lives.I was uncomfortable with the food and had thrown it off,but that was more than satisfactory for three to four bellies.May be they wouldnt have been getting a better food or just food for days.Our nation does teach us a lot of lessons.Its not about the cultural diversity and artistic fascination,its more about the extremities of life that we see here.We have executives who would deny to travel in any other vehicle other than the S-class Mercedes Benz,where as at the other side we have people who scratch out food from tracks and roads.Their needs being different.For one life is about excelling and putting in towers of pride and power,for the other it being a story all about existence and survival.


After having seen such a thing,I just recall the scene in Swades where Sharukh buys a glass of water from a boy in spite of having mineral water with him.May be I feel I am realizing more the realities around me.Its not all about just living out in luxuries,but having a feeling,at least understanding the ground realities , understanding people around us,understanding life around us.That particular incident made me know how lucky I was.At least I am assured of the basic security of existence.So now I learn the importance of being satisfied with what I have and dont remain complaining about what I lack.I dont always believe desires are always the reason for unhapiness,maybe expectations are;but I strongly feel desires shouldnt be a reason for dissatisfaction.

I loved her

I have been trying to find courage to say something to her.Its been months now that I have tried. I have tried a thousand times or may be more ,in front of mirror,but when she comes in front,I find myself running out for words.Even I shiver to say a hi.I had met this girl at the bus stop.Its been an year now that I am seeing her everyday.
She studies at a college next to mine.From last year on,I have been very punctual to college ,hang around till 5 in the college so that I can go along with her in the same bus.At first I was shy to talk,it was she who came to me and did all the talking.She was very talkative and her family was close to me through her words even though I never saw anyone of them.So she initiated and I carried on and unknowingly she was becoming close to my heart.I dont know if she has the same feeling for me,but I think she just takes me as her friend,so what if she denies my proposal.So now I decide its better I keep my mouth shut and carry on the"friendship".

I got myself dressed up for another day at bus stop.I am finding it hard to keep acting in front of her,but I thought I would carry on.She came in time and wished me good morning.I greeted her too.She asked me, "could you please bunk an hour for me and be at the coffee shop at 4.I need to talk to you something important?".I said "why not".I was getting excited,may be she is going to break the ice,maybe she knows whats in my heart me.May be she would look into my eyes and say that she loves me.

I was at coffee shop waiting for her from 3,may be she might come early and would have to wait.It was a long wait,but I felt my patience would pay me handsome..She said"hello ,so you reached at 4, I had a bit of work so a bit late,hope you wont mind".I said," I just reached now".I didnt want her to feel awkward with my promptness.She started "You know what , there is a proposal for me in the air,He is our family friend and my parents are probably gonna fix the marriage.I know you are feeling awkward by the way am just starting to talk,but I got none else who can get me a solution".I loved her openness that she was showing and the way she trusted me, but Oh dear she was having a proposal and I was thinking she would propose me.Why do I feel my heart jerking.I dont know,but I preferred listening to her.She continued," But you know ,I just cant do that, I just cant marry some one whom I dont know much about,whom maybe I am gonna just meet a week or month before marriage.Moreover am committed to someone." Ohh I was saying to myself ,"let my ears be taken off",already she was talking about proposal and now she is committed to someone.I started swearing myself for the time I wasted in front of mirror,Had I spent 5 more minutes n front of books,I would have cleared my maths paper last time.She kept carrying on,"He is my classmate,my parents know him.But the problem is they never expect me to fall in such a relationship,but still they are very open and wouldnt mind the proposal if they are convinced".I asked her, "what am I to do?".She said "you need to talk to the guy whom I would be engaged with".

My shock absorbers were too strained ,I said,"what!!! he is your family friend and is a stranger to me,how am I gonna tell him that you love someone and move out off the marriage".She said "I just need you along with me and give a start,then I will talk to him".I said ok,even though the whole stuff seemed awkward to me, and moved to the bus stop and back to home.I just went off after getting down the bus,didnt even bother to say a bye to her.It was a painful night,I felt I was losing my grounds and all emotions felt rolling over me.

Next morning I got up fresh and got ready for another day at college.I was pretending as if nothing has happened and was making an unsuccessful attempt to forget my feelings for her. The day went on as usual and almost around noon, I had call from my uncle that my dad was hospitalized.I ran off to the hospital.That old chest pain of his has again brought him back to trouble and this time surgery was inevitable.Last time we had canceled the surgery due to financial concern,mine was a poor family and we could never have afforded the cost,we didnt even have our own house,it was rented and even my dad's pension was very meager who was a peon at a school.So selling off whatever we had,we dug out the money for surgery and thank god it was successful.He was brought back home and was asked to take rest for atleast two months.

While in the hospital she had come to see my dad and I introduced her to my mom and dad as one of my classmates,I was in no real mood to talk to her as there were far serious issues that needed solution ,so I was really unaware about what was happening at her end.It was a Monday and I would be back at college after a long leave.At the bus stop,I met her ,and asked about her happenings.She seemed dull and told engagement was going to be fixed and next week ,and that I would have to go with her to talk to him.I said ok even though was in no mood for such a thing, and went to college.Almost at 3pm,I got a call from my uncle asking me to rush to home. He didnt tel me the reason and so I set off immediately.I reached home,found a bunch of people at the gate,my uncle took me inside patting at my back with sadness shadowed over his face.I could see someone lying at the floor dressed in white and even the face was covered.I bent down on,moved the cloth of the face,and remained frozen..My father is no more.

Its a tendency that ,when someone close to our hearts pass away, we recall those moments where we have either defied or done something negative against them.I remember those days when he had advised me to study when I used to roam around.I never understood or never tried to ,what he said.I never understood my responsibilities.I never understood my father.I find my conscience pricking ,but I find its too late.Atleast now my eyes had to open.I was the only son,now my mom is alone and none to look after us.After 2 more months,I would pass out and I had to find a job immediately.Responsibilities were beckoning me for action and this time I cant say no.Romance never feeds the belly and I was knowing it better than ever.I was having a strong feeling for her even then, but I had more important works to do.She had come for the funeral and tried to console me all the time.My love was turning into more serious one which was augmented her care and concern that she showed when I really needed it.She was becoming close to me ,my feelings were getting stronger towards her,but realities kept pricking me of what was more important.The affinity seemed a painful reality,but separation would tear my heart out.

So the day has finally come.I was to go with her to meet the guy with whom she was supposed to get engaged.I knew how much I loved her,but I could no longer propose her,at least what was around me would never let me do it.It was a really an awkward role to play,but in life you does have to play roles that you never wanted to. We went to the city coffee shop where we were supposed to meet him.He came at time greeted us and I was starting to talk that she just began,"Rahul,I wanted to tel you something important, I am not ready for this marriage.......",she went on talking, she said she love someone else a lot who cares for her more than anyone.It was more like a poem that she was versing whose each stanza kept aching my heart.He was very friendly and wasnt much worried by what she told.Infact he thanked her for being frank and asked her who is the guy,she looked at me and told,"its him".Shock would be a word of much lower intensity to describe my feeling.I was frozen.He went off and I sat still.She could understand my shock.She looked into my eyes and told that she always knew that I had loved her.She told that her boyfriend had ditched her and it was me whom she thought the only person who loved her truly.She was all tears once she started explaining her emotions to me.I was so happy.The words I expected from her ,that I saw in my dreams where clinging at my ears.I pinched myself to know if it was a dream. I felt the pain.I wanted to tell her how much I loved her and I was winding up to tell what I felt for her.

"Hey dont be silly,hope you are in your senses,I am your friend and I am happy to remain so.I have never seen you beyond that and I never want to.Moreover I am not a waste dump that one day you come along and I would start loving you.I am really sorry and I would like to cut off our relations now and here ,since you took it in the wrong sense".My words shocked her and she moved off with tears and before she left ,she looked at my eyes and whispered,"I love you".I wasnt a good actor till then,but destiny has taught me to take up a new role,of that of a traitor who cheats his own heart.Life is so unexpected that you face situations which you always wanted to ,and when it comes,you respond the way you never wanted to.My feelings were all over me.I knew what I had spoken and what I really wanted to tell her.But fate and realities danced over my words.My eyes were filling up,I didnt cry even when my father died.But today,its that helplessness that makes me cry at heart.I love her with all my heart,may be more than anyone ever can,but....

Well months have passed, and now I have transplanted myself to a newer place.Fortunately I could clear my papers and if fortune favours,I would soon be joining a multinational company.My mom is happy now and am sure we would have a better life from now on.Today I just received a marriage invitation card.She was getting married .At the end ,she had written,"sorry for what I had told you,always your friend".I felt friendship seemed to be an excuse for love.I used it once and now she seems to be using it.But one thing is sure,I always wanted her to know,Once she realised it but later I mislead her,that my feelings for her were beyond words.The words that I wanted to whisper in her ears,engrave in her heart but couldnt and I would never be able to say again," I LOVE YOU".


Note:This is only a short story based on imagination and has no relation to anyone's life or incidents.

March 29, 2008

The Devastator

He doesnt have much foot work,he doesnt follow copy book shots,neither he has patience nor he controls his shots,his name is Virender Sehwag, the first Indian to score two triple centuries in the history of test cricket.Had Sehwag put a control to his shots,he would never have reached this milestone.He creates his laws and bats accordingly,no matter who the opposition is,no matter what form of game you are playing,he only knows one thing the best-the devastation of the opposition.

His innings was a treat to eyes, an innings of power packed shots,elegance and some shots that only Sehwag can play.He just underlined the fact that he is an inevitable player in the team and moreover he is in a mission to redefine this form of cricket.Test cricket is no longer all about sitting and defending.Its more about aggression that Sehwag is displaying in the field with his bat.He might or might not score a 400 tomorrow ,but what is worth more is his unchanged attitude thats redefining test cricket from just a boredom of five days to power packed five days.Well done Sehwag, let records pave your way to glory.

March 28, 2008

300

It was a tired afternoon , me n my friend had no work to do ,so we thought we would just put on this movie just as time pass till evening.We never had an idea that it was going to be one of the most entertaining session of movie watching I ever had.One would say the movie has many graphical hip hops ,many wild imaginations,but in spite of all that this is one of the best movies I have ever seen in my life.

The movie begins with a narration of how Spartan men are grown,how a prince is grown into the king,the toughness and discipline of their training.The story gets its triggering element from the Persian messengers who comes with a message from their emperor regarding his decision of encroachment over Sparta.The messengers being kicked into the well of death and that was a call for war.But the Senate which was bribed by Persian dynasty didnt allow king to proclaim war.He instead went with his 300 body guards to defend the homeland.

It was a battle between 300 Spartans and 30,000 Persian army.Defeat was inevitable.But they fought till the last breath and finally the whole of Spartan army comes out to fight it out.The final scene of the movie where the soldiers run into the battle field is something very much memorable.

The movie is all about the character that the Spartan king and his 300 body guards show in defending their homeland.Its one of the greatest inspiring movies I have ever seen.The technical work is flawless and even more the performance of the actors are awesome.Its a great feeling that really blends us into the movie that there is no way we can move off in between the movie.Also there are so many punch dialogues in the movie that are worth mentioning .When the Persian messenger says " Our arrows will cover the sun",the Spartan replies"Then we will fight in the shade".Its more the emotional inspirational spirit that the movie creates that I liked a lot.So my opinion about the movie,"Awesome would be a word much less to describe the feel one has after watching this movie".300 ROCKSSS!!!!

D-Day

Everything that begins got to end one day.Somethings end unnoticed where as some does leave it marks and end with much fanfare.Today is our farewell day, when we would be "sent off" from our campus.Its something inevitable that comes to every engineering student after four years of hip hops and happenings.

When I look back to those cheerful and colorful days of college life,I am hesitant to moveoff, but its better that I do before being kicked off.I have had my ups and downs,but all in all its been more gained than lost in my life.More than tech skills and stuff,various experiences that you learn from here, various moments which you feel are worth treasuring , originate from the cradle of youth.I just cant believe how four years have swept away.It feels like, just hours before when we had packed off our seniors and now its us who will be given an official farewell.

Buts its fine.No complaints,no issues.
Days have passed,months have passed.
We played in sunshine and danced in rain.
We were together in troubles and shared our joys.
We did fight but only to put us closer.
Its been a happy journey thats coming to an end.
With much pain in blood and heart
But we are here to make this day
A memorable one, not just by words.
And finally when we move off
Our faces soothed off ,for the final time
By the winds from the hills
We have nothing left to give
Other than tears from the heart
With the words that break our nerves and veins.
"Adieu LBS"

March 26, 2008

Iam Legend


I am not a regular movie watcher,basically my movie watching is constrained to the opinions by my friends.So when I was suggested this movie,I did expect a good fest to eyes.But once I saw the movie ,my words of appreciation had reached the superlative degree.Will Smith (Independence day fame) is the main role of the movie enacting Robert Neville, a doctor.He along with his dog happens to be the only survivors at Ground Zero,New York and possibly all other inhabitants had been affected with some sort of cancer that caused almost a complete extinction of human species.

Everyday he roamed around the lonely and dusty city with no other human beings to talk with.He transmitted his voice through radio in search of other human inhabitants.Meanwhile he faces a confrontation with the diseased beings who attack him ,but he escapes.Soon his dog is attacked by the diseased beings and he kills the dog as even it gets infected.So finally he remains as the lone man.Those scenes are very touchy and highlights the mastery of the actor in his expressions.Finally he meets two other survivors who claim there are more survivors.Soon his house gets attacked by the diseased beings, he along with the two survivors gets into the chamber where a diseased person was being treated,he discovers that the medicine he tested on the diseased being has worked and the person was returning back to the normal life.He tried to convince the beings who were hitting themselves at the glass door of the chamber to attack him,that he could save them.He asks the two survivors to escape through a small tunnel and gives them the medicine.Robert Neville takes a grenade,detaches its pin and sacrifices himself and this is his legend.

The movie appears slow at times,but the story and the direction is just about perfect.The feeling of loneliness of Robert Neville even upsets the viewers and I would prefer you better dont watch the movie alone.Finally he sacrifice himself to defend the medicine he has found to cure the disease.lam Legend is really a treat to eyes and hats off to Will Smith, he was superb.So I would suggest you to watch the movie and I promise,you would have one more name to add to the list of all time favourites.

Tranquility

Note:Understandability is least guaranteed.

Its nice to hang around with friends,its awesome to be with your near and dear ones.Everything is fine when you have people to share it with.But there are some pains that can never be shared like the one I have in my mouth now that has forbidden me taking food and almost its like some sort of forced fasting.But again this happens to be just a physical pain.

There are far more severities to a man thats much harder to digest.Even tears happen to be away from you,especially when you know certain things doesnt come your way coz of someone else's faults.Life at times puts you in conditions where both choices hurts you a lot and you would prefer both coz you never have a third option.I opt to choose the one thats risk free,but again it keeps me pricking,I find myself running for cover from being called a coward.I myself is putting me back to that sea of tranquility where I have always found it hard to swim.But as always history repeats and I find myself getting ready for another hibernation of senses,back to the sea of tranquility where I sit and stare hoping for a shore.I find the inertia of motion of my thoughts and body that pull me deeper and deeper to a world where I miss even my own reflections.Its that boring me and my thoughts with none around.no noises,no reflections,no voices.

Tranquility initiated and this time may be it reaches its zenith.Certain feelings are beyond explanations,beyond words,no friends,no blogs cant be a platform to put it into.It just stays in asking for transparency and yet that translucency happens to be the state of self; perplexing,confusing and visibility displaying in stupidity ,the feel that creeps in your mind after reading this post.Its an insanity of thought thats clogging in me and this is a vague attempt to put it down over here.My failure of presentation happens to be a case of utter voidness within me even which I find hard to digest.It sounds verbal acrobatics even to me ,but I dare to say no.I am just losing the ground of thoughts ,ability of expression; may be solution is in the other horizon.

March 23, 2008

A point to ponder

Its been a long time since we have been hearing about the perils and merits of urban culture. Even I had a mention regarding this in my post Love,lust and life , but now we have got another proof of how fatal the present lifestyles can be. I was really shocked on hearing the Koramangala incident where a techie after killing his wife committed suicide.Thanks to CNN-IBN for their complete coverage of the news.

Karl Marx had once quoted that 90% of the problems arise out of financial issues.But time has come to rewrite that phrase.Its not about rewriting a phrase,its about rewriting the whole transformation of society and lifestyles thats to be prosecuted.There is no such era in the history of mankind where extra marital affairs and related issues has drawn attention to this regard; in fact it seems now a days , these issues are more a part of society status rather than a concern of thought.The techie or the murderer was a software engineer working with an IT giant, where as the woman was a marketing professional. The reason could never be financial issue with the suicide note clearly pointing to an extra marital issue. The abrupt end to the two lives came up within just an year of their marriage.Thanks to the suicide note that reveals the reason for the mishap.

The point to wonder is the pace how things crawl up in a relationship; a wife pursuing on with her extra marital affair in spite of her husband's fury, a husband who resorts to death after killing her wife which in no way seems to have been the solution.Again the insensitivity which the present human machine shows in relationships and the flexibility he/she efficiently utilises to switch across relations seems to be the villian. No counselling,no meditation classes can ever heal the wounds thats mushrooming up from the present physic sociological factor or aspect that describes every relation as a contract of interdependence and mutual benefit aimed at one's success and attainment of excellence in his/her working domain independent of emotions or discouraging thoughts of passion and commitment out of human feeling.Unless and otherwise we introspect our attitude towards life and understand ourselves that life is not all about academic excellence, brilliance in technical domains , ******** or *******; its more about understanding your fellow beings, having an emotional attachment to them which is defined as love, and taking relationship more than just a contract.Since I am still single, I am not an authority to speak on married life, but atleast please dont take your marriage just as a business contract.

The recent survey showed that most of women does agree for office romance for their academic growth. I dont think there is a better example for moral degradation. We seem to professionalized, a next stage of being civilised. So its high time we chose a healthier option of life, the one that doesnt lead to dehumanisation.Lets have trust and commitment in our relationship coz we never get chance to bat twice in a single inning.

Definition of present human being: A biological machine designed to have embedded emotions and feelings,but transformed into a professional idol of insensitiveness and business oriented mentality with self developed adaptability and flexibility to fall in contractual relationships with fellow beings aimed at self appraisal and professional excellence.Exceptions found who either dont survive or are transformed to the current form.

March 21, 2008

Necessity is ...

Hello guys ,its been a lot I have been writing on my nostalgic thoughts on the college days. I felt (even some of my readers) that its high time that I stop the acrobatics with nostalgic thoughts at least for some time and give something for readers to cheer on rather than make them dull.(If I ever made you,I beg your pardon).This post is all bout again my college,but not about the feelings that I share with it ,But the spirit that I see in the college now a days.

All alumnis watch out,our college seems to have changed,not only in colour,but also in attitude.I wonder how long it remains, but longer the better.Its the cooperation among faculty , staff and students that is seen now a days thats really worth mentioning.For the first time in these whole four years, I felt,the college is really working for its mission,even though accreditation being the target next door. I never had thought to see my college painted new before I move off the college.It was not the only surprise, we have new road dug to the Administrative block, our class rooms being painted, all documents being filed and moreover new teachers and full time classes( even though the last one wasnt so acceptable). The most positive aspect is that nobody now complaints administration or put blame over others.Is it more of the change in attitude or lack of time thats brought in this transformation,the answer is still hard to find , but this is certainly a positive step.Getting accreditated being a major concern due to certain financial issues has certainly charged the whole foes. Its more like war front where none has time for chit chat or idleness and its all team spirit that sprinkles the whole work. Everyone seems to be determined to achieve the target and the coordination among departments,students and the whole work force has a unity of direction.

Tomorrow being the D-DAY,its been hard work from teachers,staff and students that will be under test for two days from tomorrow.Is it enough or not is not an important question,but the issue is to keep this spirit even after the two day accreditation inspection ends.Well would it remain is a question that still lacks a transparent answer.Lets just wait and watch,but for now ,the target is set ,the foes are ready and what is left is the dash to target.So what I feel after seeing this transformation is Necessity is not only the mother of invention,but at times the initiator of introspection too.

March 19, 2008

ARMAGEDDON

ARMAGEDDON is a term associated with the ultimate battle between good and evil which ends with the victory of anyone and the other perishes for ever. The perplexity of thought ,that you face on seeing the title of this post where you expect me to put in a note of my final year in college,would soon plunge out off the junk of thoughts when I would put down before you the battle,that runs in the blood and brain of every final year student ,every year time and again, the war that takes better out of you unless and otherwise you are an emotionless human machine,the battle that would see you losing to the inevitable cruelty of time,the battle which is still fought out even after knowing its futility when victory is the prime parameter.But there are wars where victory is not the only thing,where fighting is the order and the spirit to overcome the jeopardy of defeat is the victory that happens to be the relevance of the matter even though the reality is much painful.

Its the fight where the good is your feeling or desire to be together and fight against the time that ruthlessly pulls you from each other.Every bond is shaken if not broken and the affinity is the term that we have been affine to, is a painful word that we would have ever come across.I dont know how many of my friends would be feeling the desire to rewind the time and remain in the cradle of memories.But its foolish to think about something thats never gonna happen , instead move on with an urge to split and enjoy every moment thats to come now.If time is so cruel, lets take the challenge to enjoy every moment of it thats left out and dont ever spare a moment to regret.

Getting on to the seventh semester was an arrival to the final round of the game with above mentioned thoughts clogging in my mind.There was no move on in my mind other than this thoughts,but the determination to face it on always pulled me on and kept my energy levels high.One thing was sure,we were no longer ready to be chained within four walls or by the huge books that we might have to eat in. Luckily 7th and 8th sem was all about so called kathi subjects and so going through books was the last thought that we ever wanted in our brains.7th sem was all about roaming around in the campus, spending time in canteen that we had termed the worst cafeteria in the world( is that word inapt??), but even those stale dosas had fresh memories to share. Our 6th sem exams just came in during October and so the final October in campus was eaten up with it.Then followed by lab exams, then we knew we were into the 2008 and the final sem,and before grabbing in the fact ,it was time for lab exams,then 7th sem exams and bla bla bla ( academic curriculum always irritates at the final sem).

The most noticeable fact was my friends were getting more serious.All thoughts were about finishing the course in time and not dragging the story with baclogs.Every one wanted to clear their baclogs and there was more purpose and target in the air.One of the really funniest moments that I prefer treasuring had just been on the way.It was meeting a first year student and it requires no explanation how you would ever be meeting a first year student,especially being a final year student.There was a prank issue that just crept up even though my share was limited, during the meeting.But the whole incident ended up in giving me a very good friend and as the saying goes, All is well that ends well.

Now there is no point in using past tense in this post anymore.All of us are getting busy with our project works,assignments and waiting for those results that would be announced.. well I doubt even if God knows when.But again now its the time to enjoy the final days.Its about planning the final trip of college life.Its about knowing more and more people in college,its about collecting more and more precious moments to the bag of memories, its all about knowing yourself more and its about accepting the arrival of dusk with a smile and as the saying goes ALL IS WELL THAT ENDS WELL..

March 17, 2008

The penultimate round

After the horrific fourth sem,it was a move on to a new sem with a lot of aspirations.For our relief, our teachers told us fifth sem wont bug as much as fourth did. So it was party time,we would sit in classes for the sake of attendance and class seemed more like a club. It was then we had an idea of a class trip and there was no hesitation from any of the classmates.But as in all cases are ,authorities seemed to be the villain of the script, we needed teachers with us and none was ready to come with us.I still remember having run behind each and every teacher I could see around and it was more like playing some nursery game.Finally somehow we got two teachers ready to accompany us after a long struggle.Then we had the hurdle of getting approval and with lot of pain and struggle that was done too.

We had a four nights and three days trip.It was really worth a journey,it was more about getting to know each other.The bonds between us grew harder and thicker and we cheered and sang in rain and sunshine,those moments are always treasured and the only moment when we were sad was on that early morning when the journey in skies ended up at the gates of LBS.Then again there was a rush of exams,sessionals in between ,our cultural fest RHYTHM and again back to exams and assignments.Fifth sem just passed off swiftly unnoticed probably coz it was the most enjoyed period of our lives. Then to sixth sem,we were getting deeper into the thick and thin of our trade and the sem was just passing away uneventful.Then all of a sudden on March 10,there was a recruitment drive at Cochin and that triggered the idea of getting placed in everyone's minds.For the first time in last three years,I could see me n my friends working for a purpose,many got through to jobs and many didnt,but everyone did have the will n desire to get through.

Soon we were getting close to the end of another semester,but this time it was unnoticed coz of the Placement Fever.But again we finished three big years in the college an never knew we were at the twilight.For the first time ,we felt we were becoming nostalgic or too emotional at times.The affinity was getting stronger when the inevitable separation seemed somewhere around the corner.But again we kept those thoughts aside and marched from the penultimate round to the final round.It was really getting serious and the game was on.

March 15, 2008

The predators

Once you are in second year, there is a feeling in everyone as that of being the boss and even we couldnt be different. It was like we are the uncrowned kings of the college, we tend to forget that there were seniors above us. This is the time when you find confronting ideas within your classmates, you are grouped into different ideologies and there is a line of separation based on ideologies( I wont stress that word much) among friends, you see your friends fighting for unknown reasons and there has been moments when I have stared ,at such fights where my friends are eager to show their shoulders over there, with much a shock and a feeing of pain coz I could only remain as a mere spectator and nothing more.

Now that was one part of the story , at the other side of the story,we were getting ready for our juniors to treat them properly.But as always I am concerned the unexpected again happened. None of us knew about the unwritten law in LBS that usually the second years are the prey to third years since then there wont be any issue related to ragging,how could we ever complain in second year that we are ragged by third years. But again that ragging didnt span for much long. Soon we got our juniors in ,but again ragging was strictly prohibited and we couldnt ever think of getting blackmarked. So we were happy to remain as good guys and our third semester got completed without much hiphops or happenings.

I still remember the first day of fourth semester at our class when our teacher marhced in with these golden words " dont hope to get through fourth sem easily, its the toughest, even if you try may be you might fail",I dont think you can ever get a better encouragement and also better excuse for not to study.When teacher says its hard to pass, well why should we waste our time trying.That semester was eventful with academic works;assignments homeworks sessional and oh god let me forget those things.

Then again we had our second summer vacation at our college since we had been to the so called desert.Now we were marching to the supersenior position. Getting into third year,we were hoping to be more relaxed and cool and hoped for a better semester.We never knew what was in store.

March 14, 2008

The dash to the new world contd.

Basically when you are out to the college after your school, every one does have the tendency to bring in many of the instincts thats cropped in one's school days, like attending all the classes,bothered about homeworks and class notes and most important,preparing for sessional exams. Even I did inherit those properties to my initial year at college, the only hour I bunk was the mechanics hour, that too ,it was the last hour of my first year, I still remember the days when I took leave to prepare for my sessional exams and the pain I took to finish off my homeworks in time.One thing that remains unchanged yesterday and today and probably in the coming years too is my handwriting, its just awesomely terrible(dont look for this phrase in dictionary, you will never find it).

Some of the other moments that I cherish the most is the moment when God showed me one of the most innocent of guys you would ever find in this world. He is one of the most innocent and the most softest at heart, I would say one shouldnt be as soft as that. I remember the day when he was late to reach,Our mathematics teacher just fired a volley of words on him , in fact it was more a kind of fun filled swearing. After being at the receiving end, he sat near me( that was his usual place.)and I could see tears falling off his eyes.Oh dear ,I had never seen someone cry for such a reason even at high school (you dont expect anyone to do so),he rubbed off his tears with his handkerchief and then back to the business of listening in the class.This is something that I would be remembering till my last breath coz such an innocence and softness ,I had never seen and I never hope to see again.

Then of course, we always preferred fixed places.It was like there was some magnet or something that fixed us to our usual places and that monotony of seating,even though to a small extent, still continues.First year in college was all about attending the classes, doing your works properly, scoring handsome in tests, looking for new "relations" and not to forget ,escaping from the seniors, so called demons.

My first two semesters which probably spanned about 6-7 months got ended with our semester exams and we were just as happy as we could ever be coz, we would no longer have to hook in those monotonic and unromantic uniforms , we would no longer be ragged and we are now SENIORS and were eagerly awaiting for our preys.Now we still had three more years in the college

March 12, 2008

The dash to the new world

October 7th 2004 ,a bright morning ;The day I would never ever forget in life when I stepped into the virtually walled campus of LBS. New faces full of aspirations and freshness roaming around the seminar hall ,the oldest faces were ready at the entrance of seminar hall to greet us and to protect us from "ragging". My heart was really throbbing hard initially out of fear of ragging; I still remember those staring eyes of my senior( I dont know his name, but felt he just wanted to eat me up).

The first one I was to meet was Libi,the coir haired( she would kill me for using such a metaphor) girl, Her smile with almost all her teeth out for exhibition was really a warmth of friendship that I wished to get from new life that was to begin that day.Not to forget, our sweet Kevin whom I had known since school days;we just had a walk around the campus and then left the campus.

On October 11th ,we were back again to the place, which was to decide our destiny and fate in the forthcoming four years, it was not just confined to academic standards, but a more emotional binding that I wanted between myself and the new friends I would get.First day it was all about meeting new friends, shaking hands with them and ofcourse to start with, some diplomatic conversations. There was uniqueness in each and everyone's character, the seriousness that was engraved in Ashwin's face , the energy packed Evin , the most silent among the lot Sijo. (Evin and Sijo later got transferred).

It was a fantastic beginning with the people I met , almost meeting the parameters I had set regarding friendship, a prejudiced mind you would call,but what was in store was never prejudged or prejudiced; the most vibrant and happening period in everyone's life- the campus life.
(to be continued..)

Memory lane

Down the memory lane I go









Remembering those moments of fun & happiness



Where sorrow was a term out of minds













we thought we would be together for a millenium














But time is so cruel
That it snatched four lovely years from our hands
So swiftly
that we never knew










this would be the last time ,we would ever have a snap like this

March 9, 2008

A pinch of moments

Its been a long time now since I have written something in my blog.Basically being in midst of exams, I couldnt find time to be here and almost the embedded laziness within me did pull me off many a time.But now I do feel I have some memories worth sharing.

Last two days,me n my friends,exactly four in number had a blast of time at Trivandrum. We were sent from our college as a team inorder to participate in the intra state tech-fest YAGNA 08. It was indeed a pleasure trip more than the essence it was meant to serve,but not to forget ,we did do our job what we were expected to do. It was more an exploration of the state capital walking through the roads of the state capital, which started at 5.00 in the morning on 6th March once we got down at the railway station.We had our breakfast and moved on to the college.To be frank,we just a felt a bit awkward at the out set coz we were the only boys seen around in the college amidst an ocean of girls.But later there were more guys to be seen for our respite.We were there till evening and did participate in some of the events. Then moved to the town where we ran to the theater to watch a movie.After the show got back to our rooms and had a nightmarish sleep guarded by mosquitoes.

Next morning it was time for some exploration.After having breakfast, we set out for exploring the city, walked through various streets , visited museum,zoo park and whatever came our way.After having lunch, we moved to the college to attend the prize distribution. After collecting our prize money and certificates, we dashed back to our rooms ,picked up the bags and then to railway station to catch the train.We got into the train and it was bye bye Trivandrum. How swiftly those two days had brushed off from our lives. It was moments of joy and meeting new people and getting new friends. Like all good moments are,even this was short lived ,but again no complaints ,no regrets coz we really did enjoy a lot, a trip to remember and another pinch of good few moments to cherish throughout the life.